Saturday, December 6, 2008

We Live a Humble Life

Without a dishwasher. I mean we have many able bodied dishwashers, but none that require electricity. I tell this because I have relinquished most dishwashing duties to the 8 year old and the 6 year old. It. Is. Killing. Me. Which is actually good for the control freak in me. After all they have to become contributing responsible citizens at some point. It is just hard to watch the drying towel wrap around my sons head and God only knows what else it does just before it goes to dry a dish...

In other news. My older two bathe themselves. After this next dialogue that I am going to share I am questioning whether that was a good call on my part...

One of my children who shall remain nameless, because I am sure at some point they will care that I share things about them, informed us that they liked the smell of skunks. This comment was then followed by I like the smell of skunks because it is not half as bad as the smell between my toes...

And I will leave you with that.

God bless.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Smoothing Off the Rough Edges

As you know I have 3 children. The first two were VERY well behaved babies and toddlers for the most part. I could reprimand them with minimal scolding or hand swats. My third, notsomuch, let's just say that he is very different...

I have puzzled over this matter for many hours wondering is it because I am doing something different? No, I mean things are a little different, but I am not easier on him than the other two. Here is what the Lord has imparted to me.

Being a parent, as you probably know, helps us to become selfless(hopefully!) and more like Jesus Christ--servantlike. Caleb was given to us because we had A LOT more work that needed to be done. Apparently, my rough edges had not been smoothed down at all with the first two! And now, I am struggling.

I have been praying for the last year that the Lord would search my heart and use the fire of His Holy Spirit to cleanse my heart to make me more like Him(I do not tell you this because I think that I am anything great--I am not, quite the opposite actually--I am in desperate need of change). It just so happens that He will give you anything that you ask as long as it is not to consume upon the lusts of your flesh!

OH MY GOODNESS!!! I never thought that there could be SO much darkness and sin in ONE heart... And He often uses my little man to show me. Because honestly, Caleb wears me out. And sometimes I get grumbly and say things like "I cannot wait for him to grow up he breaks EVERYTHING!!! I just want my stuff to stay nice and I just want my house to be safe and I and my blahblahblah!!!" Then the Holy Spirit is quick to show me my selfish thinkin', imagine! I asked for it! Of course there is grace, praise Jesus, and of course His mercies endure forever thank you GOD, but that does not negate the fact that I am having a VERY difficult time enjoying being a mommy with this one. I am constantly needing the gently reminder from the Lord that being a mom is an act of servanthood--selflessness, for some reason I do not do that well. Is this normal? Or, am I a spoiled brat? Sometimes I am merely treading water with the parenting of this wee one.

All of that to say that God has a WHOLE LOT of work to do in me! SO as I draw closer to Him the sinful condition of my flesh becomes more obvious and that much more detestable because honestly there are MANY days that I feel like I may be barely moving forward toward a more Christlike nature. It certainly is a very good thing that we never "arrive"...

Jesus Please help me to be more like you, I am failing soooo much!!! I need you. Help me, Lord. AMEN.

God bless and I hope that I am not alone in this!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

To Post Personal Stuff or Not to Post...

That is the question...

I have struggled with this one question for some time! I really want to share my life with some people... However, I don't know about others! I don't mind sharing my testimonies about what the Lord is doing and has done in my life for His glory!

But the mundane details of my life and that of my families I am just not sure... And then there is always the problem of where do I start??? I don't know... It baffles me.

So, today I am going to share with whoever would care to know that I run. And lest you think too highly of me, don't. Because honestly, I don't like the actual act of running--it hurts me. I do, however enjoy the benefits, you know like blowing off steam aka decompressing, staying healthy, maybe keeping the pounds at bay, I think that about sums it up. And so since the benefits outway the loathing that I feel toward running I continue to do it! I made a goal on Jan. 8, 2007(when my baby was 5wks) that I would run regularly for a year, when that goal passed I just made it another year goal and now we are approaching 2 years of consistant running! Which is a miracle in itself because I do not stick to consistant workout. EVER. I go in 6 month spurts and it seems like that is my M.O. I am determined to break that habit and so I run.

And man I feel so good when I finish a run.

I share all of this with you to tell you about a run that I had on Monday. If you have never ran then this might be difficult for you to understand. Running is painful, if you run distance. Monday was my long run, 10 miles, and it was VERY windy with temps at about 35-40 degrees. I run on a mile long track and everytime I came around this certain corner the wind would nearly push me backwards-made my eyes water. I kept asking the Lord to please spare me!!! This is what He spoke to me:

"Your walk with Me is much like running. It is hard. Not popular, painful even, alot of the time. Sometimes the run is less painful and you have joy, you feel good, the temperature is perfect and you cannot quit being glad that you are able to run and feel this good, but most of the time there are hurdles and trials and the road is long and arduous. This wind you are experiencing is similiar to the wind that is about to come to this nation. It is going to be feirce, painful, you will "feel" like you are being pushed backwards, your eyes may pour tears from the sting of it, but DO NOT FEAR, cling to Me, keep your eyes on Me DO NOT GIVE UP! The outcome for you may not look like what you have in mind, for my ways are not your ways and my thoughts are above you thoughts."

Alot of times, in fact, most of the time, the Lord uses my runs to speak to me, or ask me to pray. This time was not different it was just way more obvious(not sure how to explain) like His voice in my spirit was "louder". So, my plan is to press into Him with all that I have and not look to the left or the right, just keep my eyes on Jesus Christ. I can assure you that during this race that we are in toward the prize of the high calling of Jesus Christ that that will be the ONLY way that we can make it...

God bless,